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deaddustwitchI have this deep, incessant urge to lock in, but also I can't find it in myself to care about any of the sciences. If I get a six I'll thank the void.
I really want to stop sleeping. Idk why. But I feel like if I just exist and do nice things instead, I'll just have a better time. I get weird dreams about people I love dying, which isn't fun tbh. My other dreams are just a bit surreal...so yeah.
Part of me is like, sleep, get good, care. But I don't. But I do. Idk.
Why don't we see things about the Russia Ukraine war anymore? Why do we hear almost nothing about Palestine? Why is the world unraveling, making it even harder for people like me and my friends to exist.
I always knew the world would die. I just assumed I would die first.
Sometimes I wonder what it'd be like if I was sick. Like really sick. I think about not telling anyone, just vanishing. Then they hear that I'm gone, and they're sad. Or I think they're sad. Why am
I so morbid? I'm meant to be a silly witch but noooo.
Tonight, I'll do some physics. Then I'll watch vods until my head hurts and my eyes are heavy. It's easier to sleep when you try and stop yourself from it.
I want my life to be full. I want to be so busy until I burn out, like a shooting star. But I wonder what I'll do when the sparks fade.
Sometimes I think to myself, if I don't have these clubs, these commitments, then what's the point of existing? Last year, I would pull myself out of my spirals by telling myself, you have a dance show, you have to go to rehearsals for the musical, people are counting on you to show up. And then I would stay okay.
I wish I could just stay okay regardless.
Sorry, this is a terrible ramble. I think I'll be better soon. I might just ramble about the book I'm writing, or my latest ocs at some point instead. But I need to pull myself out of whatever this is first. I'm not depressed. I think. I just need sleep. It's an endless cycle I guess.
I wish existence was easier. Then maybe we would all do it more often.
-Mimi
I really want to stop sleeping. Idk why. But I feel like if I just exist and do nice things instead, I'll just have a better time. I get weird dreams about people I love dying, which isn't fun tbh. My other dreams are just a bit surreal...so yeah.
Part of me is like, sleep, get good, care. But I don't. But I do. Idk.
Why don't we see things about the Russia Ukraine war anymore? Why do we hear almost nothing about Palestine? Why is the world unraveling, making it even harder for people like me and my friends to exist.
I always knew the world would die. I just assumed I would die first.
Sometimes I wonder what it'd be like if I was sick. Like really sick. I think about not telling anyone, just vanishing. Then they hear that I'm gone, and they're sad. Or I think they're sad. Why am
I so morbid? I'm meant to be a silly witch but noooo.
Tonight, I'll do some physics. Then I'll watch vods until my head hurts and my eyes are heavy. It's easier to sleep when you try and stop yourself from it.
I want my life to be full. I want to be so busy until I burn out, like a shooting star. But I wonder what I'll do when the sparks fade.
Sometimes I think to myself, if I don't have these clubs, these commitments, then what's the point of existing? Last year, I would pull myself out of my spirals by telling myself, you have a dance show, you have to go to rehearsals for the musical, people are counting on you to show up. And then I would stay okay.
I wish I could just stay okay regardless.
Sorry, this is a terrible ramble. I think I'll be better soon. I might just ramble about the book I'm writing, or my latest ocs at some point instead. But I need to pull myself out of whatever this is first. I'm not depressed. I think. I just need sleep. It's an endless cycle I guess.
I wish existence was easier. Then maybe we would all do it more often.
-Mimi
